This is the first intro to one of 2 protagonists in a saga purported through this blog. Enjoy it and check the prologue to the plot here prior reading any further.

[Driving his brand new 300hp BMV through Kensingtown, Humpty is handling his daily morning routine, starting with a straight 30-minute round of affirmations].

I am the best, I am the best looking, I have the best haircut, I am loved and appreciated by all my clients, I have a PhD in Insulting, I have 3 Masters degrees no one else can get, I know everything, everyone owes me because I am awesome!

[30 minutes is a long time but Humpty can do it with ease, then he´ll start generating “billable hours” by doing some calls]

Hey Morty, how are you today bro? Pass me the number of that King from Zimbagistan, I have the strategy ready to get it cracking. There is a way to add infinite complexity on his group of companies by introducing 2 folding companies and an agreement en participation only we can administer, yielding high retainer fees and maintenance cost, …..

[by that time Mortys mind in numb, he lets Humpty blabber away and then passes on the number].

Your highness, I have the solution to handle your project. I will come present it to you in about an hour’s time if that is OK for you?

[The King agrees, Humpty prepares a powerpoint slideshow featuring a single slide with a single sentence –> “create folding companies” (if you were wondering, he meant “Holding” companies but the King would probably not care anyway as this is too much detail according to Humpty)].

Your highness, I shall now explain to you the contents of my thorough presentation which involves excellence, years of experience and the network of my business partner Mortimer.

[Just as a reminder, for the purpose of this plot, the King is a fraud, but he now has a problem. He understands that he tries to hustle a hustler which in general is a bad idea. Moreover, he has to acknowledge Humpty’s insane skill level as he never saw anyone presenting absolutely nothing so well].

[The next thing the King knows is that he really signed off on a 10 year insulting agreement with a monthly retainer worth 5 chipcoins (read Mortys intro for further info on that) until he defrauded enough money from potential contacts delivered by Morty & Humpty]

I am so glad that we have finally came to an agreement, let´s celebrate this tonight in St.Tropical at the Café del Bar, I´ll organize the private jet if you´d lend me your credit card for a minute.

[Of course, the insulting agreement covers fringe benefits which now cost the King about 5 extra chipcoins just for the days. Let´s see how this plays out!]

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Mortimer

This is the first intro to one of 2 protagonists in a saga purported through this blog. Enjoy…